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You sound like a high level person with a ton of ambition, Janus. That’s a great thing, especially for someone still in high school. You seem to have the kind of personality that will drive you far in life. You hold yourself to a high standard, hence the AP classes and the desire to take on a bunch of new hobbies. All of this is fantastic, and please know that you’re operating a far higher level than a LOT of high schoolers, at least the ones I knew back in the day.
Keep doing what you’re doing, Janus. But just like you work hard on your studies, hobbies, and ambitions, maybe you should try to work on your self esteem too. And I mean to really work on it with the same daily consistency as you would any other project. Treat it like a sport, except the rewards will take you further than any trophy ever could. For what its worth, writing down positive affirmations and reading them to myself worked wonders for my own mentality, and a lot of successful people say the same thing. Just write 10 ideal beliefs about yourself, stated in the present tense, and read it for 5 minutes a day. It doesn’t cost anything, and if anyone sees you doing it, it looks like you’re just studying your notebook 🙂
Bruce Lee said “The maintenance of self-esteem is a continuous task which taxes all of the individual’s power and inner resources.” So even he had to work on it. Then again, maybe that’s where his ultra confident screen presence and self belief came from! (I believe it did).
Keep kicking butt, Janus.