Hi again Anita!

yes so I only thought he smoked cigarettes because of a miscommunication. I don’t even know why I turned it down because I really want to go to a Halloween costume contest. I learned it’s better if I embrace myself. I learned that I cannot shut down when someone say they love me and I learned that I need to do the things I enjoy with our worrying about my family. 🙂

Hi Anita.

I want to hope that it will but I’m also afraid because he is someone who doesn’t like to burn bridges. So he could just being nice because that is in his nature.

Hi yes I’ll elaborate on those things.

so the family plans thing was really about he would invite me to do things and I would turn him down just incase my family wanted to make plans that day and I didn’t want to hurt their feelings (for instance he wanted to take me on a beach get away the weekend after my birthday and I turned him down because my parents might want to do my birthday those days and I didn’t want to hurt their feelings and a similar situation with Halloween)

i was shutting down in order not to be a weird person because my ex boyfriend was abusive and didn’t actually like me for me and I was afraid to open up.

The not feeling well was due to a reaction I had when I tried a diva cup. I nearly fainted and thought I was found to be sick. I told him and he rushed over to get me in bed make me take medicine and hold me until I fell asleep. The plans were there before mentioned beach get away and Halloween plans.

I think I covered everything.

Thanks!

Hi Anita.
More or less yes. I also considered my families plans too much when making plans with him to the point where I wasn’t being flexible with what he wanted to do even though I wanted to do those things too. This made him think I didn’t want to do anything fun. The smoking ended up not being a deal breaker because it turned out he just smoked weed sometimes which is legal where we live. This doesn’t bother me. I also don’t know what to do with the regret about not being me because I drove someone special away. I also feel lost because he has still talked to me pretty consistently and looked at all of my Instagram stories. Overall I’m just heart broken wishing I behaved differently wondering what to do.

Thanks you for your replies Anita!
Yeah I didn’t even think to ask about it! Which is silly considering it is something that is very important for me.
I want to sit down with him and ask him some questions about it. And see where he stands on quitting or if it is something he’s already really into. I feel like we are young and this is something that could easily be stopped but I’m not sure he’s willing. I think this whole thing is hard for me because I don’t often find people I click with this way and losing the relationship scares me but this could be something that breaks us.