Thankyou so much for both replies.

Would it be okay to ask for a little more context about how that person bullied you?——-
– threats of violence- threats of spitting in my face when they see me – throwing objects such as  cigarette lighters in public at me – smashing my living room window – starting false rumours that my mum tried to kilL herself – telling other people not to hang out with me. 

Perhaps your friend feels like the person who bullied you as a teenager has changed?As far as I’ve heard the person hasn’t changed.

It might sound like a silly question, but what hurts about your friend spending time with someone who used to bully you? Do you feel like your feelings are being devalued? That your friend is prioritising the bully? That your friend isn’t protecting you?

– yeah I feel like my feelings have been devalued – that they don’t care how that person treated me

Can I ask about your concerns regarding trust? Do you feel like your friend would treat you differently or pass on gossip?

– I feel that she will pass on gossip – that she is a secret frenemy as they say

I have distanced myself from this friend considerably and see them maybe twice a year now due to how I feel. I have told her how I feel about the bully in the past but I haven’t told her how I feel about her spending time with her. Mainly because I don’t want to seem petty and I feel she would gossip and talk about it to other people. I also haven’t spoken to her about it as I don’t think much can be done now. Their children are friends now.