Mark,

To answer your questions Me and Tom are both 25 now while Harry is 29. Me and Tom never married due to the financials though there was talk about it in the future. Me and Tom share custody of our daughter with him having her every other week.  I couldn’t deny him the right to seeing her as much as i did as I felt it was unfair. He is a great father, and has always treated he right. He is with his grandmothers and I have my own apartment we live a few miles from one another.

We have not tried couples counseling because Tom does not like the idea of bring and outside person int our relationship. Talks of feeling with him have always gone off track we’d start at a good point and end up in a huge blow out. The problem with our communication is that he gets frustrated easily and he starts raising his voice, which then triggers my anxiety and I start crying and then he fells bad and the conversation dies there instantly with nothing being resolved. We have struggled with this for years and this is not the first break up though this is the longest we have been separated. Normally its only for a day or two and i go back. I know communication is key and with Harry I can tell him anything and he never gets frustrated he never raises his voice. He helps me look at things in a calmer fashion. He knows I still have feeling for my ex and that there is still a lot of unresolved issue, but still he is by my side, never judging, just always supportive of whatever is going to bring me happiness. I think of giving Tom a second chance But then I remember how many second chances I have given him and how little has changed in that respect.