Hi

This happened to me quite recently and like you it struck a chord. The person who had done this i.e. bad mouthed lots of people in the firm and then said that people there were “clicky”, the next day went out to get some goodies and ignored to ask me if I wanted anything….Hmmmm clicky ehh? Well later in the day she had a right old go at me for nothing at all. I had simply asked if it was office policy for her to put the telephone down on me. (I work as a temp at this particular business and she was constantly doing this when I was trying to transfer calls) and I thought it was a legitimate question. She went off on one. I think the best thing to do is to recognise and more importantly ACCEPT all people. Hard to do and an ongoing process I know. I believe she had said things that she knew could get her into trouble if I opened my mouth about them (and I have not) so she did a bit of transference (please look this up, it basically means feeling bad about oneself and not taking personal responsibility for ones own happiness and having a go at someone else in order to get the feeling of control back in your life). Anyway, Maya Angelou once said “if someone shows you who they are believe them”. She has shown me who she is and I do in fact believe her and am not inclined to speak with her or engage in fun conversations. This will then set my boundaries and she knows I accept her as she is and have made an informed decision in my dealings with her. I accept her as being a person who does not take personal responsibility and I do not wish to engage, except on a professional level with her. Good luck.