In my mind in relationships you either

1. accept the person as they are – decide that the pros out weigh the cons – and have a relationship based on a full acceptance and understanding of each others strengths and weaknesses and don’t try to change them to fit you

2. accept the person as they are – realize that the cons outweigh the pros and down grade them to person you sometimes do stuff with/acquaintance or ex friend.

3. Like the idea of who you think they are, get upset with them when they don’t act in accordance with that idea, nag and nag and nag at them to change or talk about your issues and turn them completely off you destroying any pros that the real person would have bought/did bring to the relationship

And yes I did a lot of 3 before I realized this 🙂