Thank you anita. I appreciate your words and help with this.

1. He needs to be STD free, definitely honest. Age isn’t super important, but how I feel about him matters more. I would hope we’re at a similar place in life, whether that’s different ages for each of us is fine. Living situation, I want him to be on his own, as well as me on my own. I would want him to be okay with whatever the outcome, and take necessary precautions to avoid undesirable outcomes if that is an issue. Patience is also big with me. Since I’m so inexperienced, I think it would really help to have someone patient with me before, during and after, and not get irritated too easily.

2. Exclusive, monogamous, serious. As in wanting the relationship to continue, working on it, and being dedicated to it.

3. I would prefer a relationship a minimum of a few months as an exclusive couple before considering sex. Preferably longer. I’d want to be spending time together weekly at least. Obviously schedules conflict and overlap, but I believe that if someone wants to spend time with me they will make time in a way, as I would for them.

I completely agree with not rushing into things being caught up in the moment, and normally I don’t. Which is part of my frustration with myself. Why did I choose that moment of all times to stop thinking? Genitals rubbed, and that was the extent of the encounter(again sorry for the information, no way to get around it) , and I stopped it after about 30 seconds, because I started thinking again. Lapse in judgment, and beating myself up over it.