Hi Anita,

I know that I tend to jump through my thoughts that other would have difficulty understanding me, and some times I can not focus my thoughts, please pardon me, also am writing on iPad here as my laptop is in repair so please bare with me it is not that easy. I tend to just thread my thoughts, and I know it jumps all over, but it easier for me like that.

In that part about, “What would drive someone……” I agreed with you that the abused child tends not to say he/she was abused as a lake of trust, but I have just added to this conclusion that the abused child would associate the idea of him being beaten with the idea that he did some great mistake that he should be ashamed of and not mention it, and even if he wants to mention the abuse he is afraid that he will be beaten again by the person he is telling because that person would know what great mistake he did! And my very long story was about that, about when the teacher hit me and I did not tell my mom, other than it had too many diversions within that if removed would not have affected the frame of story.

I know am hard to follow, I myself face the Same dilemma with my mind, some times the thoughts are too fast for me to follow rather than expressing them, and other times am trying to write too fast to catch all of them, and when am writing stories about my childhood I tend not to read them before sending, because I know then I’ll face the burden of retacking them in and I have just let them out, I just can not read my own story, it is sad!

I have just read this post in one child abuse web site, it is that when you send your message out, you are sending to relief yourself from the burden you are carrying, and not for the sake of someone answering you, it tends to be less stressful if you did not expect an answer or you receive what you did not expect. Am sorry if I was taken by that idea to that extent. But having a loyal partner like you here, I promise you I’ll be more focused on the idea am presenting.

You understand very well, I tend to be confusing, I guess my grammar is like Yoda form star wars 🙂