Dear Anita,

To answer your questions:

What was the beauty in this relationship?: She was there for me every time, I was down, She made me laugh, be happy, confident, cry, but also, made me go through a lot of hardships as long as my personal space and time for myself is concerned. She is like a two sides of the coin(she is too good, when she is good and happy) (too bad, when she is not happy or stressed, because of her stubborn nature). I find this relationship beautiful because, she pulled me up, when I was in a time of morally low, with low self esteem and was living a life of dull and boring life(just for the sake of living) isolating myself from everyone and just spending empty and blank days altogether)

What was the meaning in this relationship to you?: As you know, I’m not living with my parents for the past 5 years, I live in a different state(but, visiting them, once in every two months). Since I was missing my mom and that feeling was lingering in me every single day, when she came into my life and started taking care of me(mostly virtually and often physically), I felt her like my mom both loving, caring, nurturing with genuine interests about my emotional and physical well being, but always strict and getting things done in her own way…this means, if she wants me to do something, which benefits her beliefs, I must do it, else, she literally threatens me that, she will leave me.. so, I used to get scared of leaving this relationship and did everything and once that is done, she is happy again and will get back to me in the same way she used to be..Now, I’m realizing that, I have exhibited the same nature which was ingrained in me by my father and I didn’t had the courage to say no to this women, when I really didn’t wanted to do it..

Now, I feel, there was no meaning at all for all the time and energy and my personal space and love, I have invested in this relationship..

What was the joy you experienced?: Being with her, gives me the inner strength, I feel like, I can do anything, if I’m with her and I will be confident in doing it, and that’s the way, she treated me…I”m not sure, if I’m even putting it in the right way, Its just a feeling, I”m not able to explain correctly.. feeling so confused…