That’s it! I am afraid to operate differently. For so long all I’ve tried to do is maintain peace so that my family thinks that I’m happy but now I’m no longer contented with that. My older brother doesn’t keep in much contact with my family anymore and I didn’t understand why but now I can relate to his decision more.

The way I see it now is that it’s nothing personal. I don’t hate them and I am eternally grateful for all that they have done for me but I am entering another stage of my life. More than likely, they won’t understand but it’s not about that, if it was then I’d spend a lifetime trying to convince them why I need to do what I need to do and never actually getting around to it. I guess that stems from me always seeking their approval.