I know I need to move out.

It’s great that you have a plan on how to deal with this, but keep in mind this is avoiding the issue, not solving it.

Anger is an interesting emotion, because more anger begets more anger. You’ve found the pattern: it’s a cycle that keeps getting worse. You found the trigger, and it’s your mom and all the things she says to you. The question is why does this get on your nerves? What is it that you’re looking for in your mom that’s so different from how she is. Why are you looking for this in your mom?

This delusional inconsistency between what you see her as vs. how she behaves comes from somewhere. What is it that you want? What are you looking for? It’s great you two are fighting because these are chances to clear things up. But when we don’t understand where we’re coming from and focus on what we’re trying to achieve, because it’s so easy to get drawn into a bicker about what’s in front of you, then you’ll get lost in the details.

You may not be able to change your mom, and you shouldn’t because she reacts to you and you react to her. It’s how we are. When you begin to focus on what you want, like feeling happy and enjoying your time with her, you can make these little corrections and talk and feel something better.

It’s expected you won’t change over night. You will get into fights and it will become worse. You know this, so work on yourself and ways you can shift your perception and focus on what you want in your relationship with mum and dad.

What’s something that you’ve done before that really excites you and instead of draining you, was actually fun to the point where time flies? Check out how you saw these past, good times and compare the emotions and thoughts of how you are now with your parents. Where’s your focus?