Dear iamfreee:

You are welcome. It will take time to achieve your goal: “be free from my jealousy and fears for good”- and it may not be for good, I don’t know. But the lesser fear, the better. Every one of us has to find a way to live with some fear.

One day, I hope you have a life partner for whom you will be number one! But with everyone else, try to talk sense to yourself when you feel you are obsessing about being number one-

And regarding strengthening the bond with your mother- I didn’t recommend that because your bond with her, on your part, was always strong. She was your number one. Unfortunately, you were not her number one. I hope you have a good enough relationship with your mother, but don’t focus on it- your healing is not with her.

I did recommend psychotherapy. Maybe your mother can help you with paying for such.

Take care of yourself and do post anytime.

anita