@anita

Thank you for always responding.

Yes, I’ve noticied in the past when I go to the movie theatre to see a movie, I become so captivated by the visuals and audio, it’s like I’m in another world for even just a short length of time. I forget to be anxious. Now, it would be nice if I could forget to be anxious all the time. I do not want to watch movies all the time, because then I would turn into my mother.

I think I understand about the double memory. I have one memory feeling normal, but my anxiety afterwards replaces the normal as something I should “fear”. I think I fear being normal? I’m not sure.

For my story, it takes place shortly after the industrial revolution in western germany, and centered around a very wealthy family’s eldest son. It’s a sort of coming of age story, I think. The main character also has to deal with being gay in a society that’s not very accepting. Also sort of a “steampunk” setting. I am just starting to figure the details out.