Hi Laure,

I think most of us have felt this way at some point in our lives. I know I have. The breakthrough for me was realizing friends or a lover is not going to make me happy. Both types of relationships can add a lot of drama and negativity to life. What will make me happy is doing more of the things that I love to do and less of the things I don’t like to do (such as being around negative people or people who just want to use me somehow).

They say that peace is a requirement for a happy life. What brings you the most peace? What makes you feel best at the end of the day? Do more of this! Perhaps you will meet someone who also loves to do these activities, which will probably make you way more compatible than someone you met in, say, a bar.

Speaking of meeting people, sites like meetup.com or okcupid.com could connect you with hundreds of people.

One last piece of advice if you are seeking change is to make sure it is realistic and positive change. Create some goals that you want to work toward. Even as little as three weeks is enough time to make a serious transformation of your life. Imagine where you want to be in, say, a year. Choose the one goal you think is most important and ask yourself at the beginning of the day, “What is one small step I can take to get the ball rolling (or keep it moving) as I develop into the person I want to become?”