Dear Nina:

It seems like this is what parents most often do, taking out their issues on their children, transferring shame, passing it on, temporarily relieving themselves from their distress by unloading it on the child. Unfortunately, it is often done, which is what perpetuating the cycle of shame and anger and abuse is about.

The part of you that is shaming yourself is your shaming parent living inside you. This is why it is taking me a long time AFTER I cut all contact with my shaming mother, to reject my internal shaming Inner Critic who took after her.

anita