XenopusTex,

I agree with you about the suicide, it is merely a threat and a ploy to get a reaction out of me. The icing on the cake was one time he took me to a river and told me he was going to kill himself, he left me on the ridge and told me “You better stay here, if you move to come after me I will blow my brains out in front of you, would you like that? And don’t you dare touch my body.” I stood there ringing my hands together, moaning his name and not daring to move, my ears straining for the sound of the gun shot. There it was, the loud crack, I crept my way reluctantly towards the trees where he had disappeared, my heart plummeted when I saw his hat laying in the trail. I began to look for blood and his body, and as my eyes slowly turned upwards, who did I see coldly staring back at me, but the man himself, crouched like a coward hiding in the bushes just to watch my reaction.

I don’t foresee him actually going through with it. It is just another way to try and hurt me and to try and take happiness away from me, and if he does pull the trigger, I am not responsible.