Hi ketty,
I have two solutions for you which you can take. The rest is up to your DH which you have no control over.
1. Two individual bank accounts and one house account. Both people put money into the house account as is needed. You do not take money out of the house account to help your parent/relatives/etc. YOUR private, individual account, however, you can do what you want with the money in there. He doesn’t have to put anything in. And with his account, he can have all his wealth… You working and giving the money to your family… as long as your money and his money isn’t mingled, he won’t feel “stolen” from .
2. That said, he might feel angry if he feels you are being taken advantage of. I have a limit on my giving to relatives, for example. I give until I would be taxed on the gift. Then that’s it! Sorry, college. Sorry, mortgage. Sorry, health problems! I know, it’s hard to put a cap on the giving, but you are limited and there are other relatives/friends/solutions.
Have your DH’s relationship with your parents/relatives be HIS relationship with them. He married you, not your family. If he can’t behave, tell him he can stay home.
Blessings,
Inky
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