Dear helleia:

You wrote: “your warning about it being distressing made me a bit nervous. Would I feel more distressed than I already am now?”

What I meant is that when we experience much fear in childhood, we automatically remove it from our awareness best we can, so to not be overwhelmed by fear and distress. When removed from awareness, anxiety and distress “leak” from its hiding place, sometimes more than at other times.

“What we resist (being aware of) persists” – and it persists by leaking misery into our minds and lives.

I read your account since fifth grade. I am thinking the more important part to your story is before the fifth grade, at home… How was home life?

anita