Hi Inspiration,

It sounds like you’re doing all the right things. You stopped with the antidepressants, you’re controlling your drinking and staying out of bars, you’re not diving head-first into a new relationship, you exercise and spend time with friends.

All of these are the right steps. And they won’t magically make your life great, because that’s some serious stuff you’re dealing with, man! Your most recent partner sounds like a right bunch of bad news. Good riddance to him.

Building your life up again is going to be a long road. Just keep the faith that you can. You are older and wiser now. And while making friends is the hardest thing, you’re not the only one who struggles with it, and there are many places where people go to try and practice just that.

Does you area have a community garden? A book club or library reading night? Cooking courses? Dance classes? Yoga? A walking club? Volunteering opportunities? Could you help out at a music festival? A street party? A local paper? Are there meditation centres where you are? Gay-friendly churches? (I dunno, I’m an atheist, but I hear people go there for community.) Befriend-an-old-person/young-person projects?

Really, my best advice is to just keep at it. You’re doing the right things. You are smart and wise and capable and strong, or you wouldn’t have made it this far. Just keep swimming, man.