Butterfly,

Smart, capable, experienced people get trapped in bad relationships all the time. I hope you’re not too hard on yourself.

Try to make peace with the part of you that still loves and misses the part of him that was good and loving. You’re not crazy for having that love still within you. But also, you know better than to act on it and allow him to play games with you again.

Care for your poor, confused heart, and keep walking away. It will get easier with time.