Hi Monklet- 2 weeks ago I told him it was over, I was very determined, however (another story) he has a driving ban for 4 months which ends in October, so he asked if he could stay in the house and help out until his driving ban was over as he would be a bit stuck (terrible public transport etc). So I agreed. Anyway over the last few days we have been getting on ok , and I think he thinks its back to normal again. I suppose in my own head, i know he is here until october at the earliest so to create an enviroment that isn’t stressful for the kids, I have been nice also and seeing what happens. However I know, and I have told him exactly how he makes me feel, if that continues, i will just say ENOUGH. I don’t believe he can keep it up for very long, as i know he has to have an outlet for his anger. Therapy i am sure would help, but i don’t think he would agree to it.
I agree a part time job would help him, but its persuading him that is the correct way to go.
I know my heart isn’t in working this out, although I do care and love him dearly, I am afraid the damage has been done and I can’t get past that. What he sees as isolated incidents, I see as a cummulative impact. Its like he has chipped a little bit of love away each time. i think he knows this which makes him more insecure and trying (albleit in the wrong way) to try and keep me close, but what it has done is push me further away.
So for now, I will try and keep the peace and see what happens, but the next explosion i think I will know in my head its done. I have laid everything on the line for him, he knows exactly how I feel, so if he continues it will just prove his lack of respect for me. Thanks for the replies again, it helps just to write things down 😉