Hi again Charlotte!
I haven’t been in your situation, but here’s what I did when I wanted to shed a friend politely.
I limited the amount of contact I had with him and I also limited the time/words.
From communicating every day the next month I wouldn’t write/call back on Sundays. The next month it was the weekends. The month after that I would only respond Monday thru Thursday. Finally every other week. At one point he went a bit crazy. But you know what I did? I let him go a bit crazy. Eventually we were “normal” together. We are friends to this day. But friends in small doses. Instead of long novellas in my texts it’s more one line sentences and an emoji.
You know what else happened? RESPECT for my feelings, and THOUGHTFULNESS in what he would say to me.
Actions speak louder than words. Yes, you distancing yourself will be awkward. Let it be awkward. Telling her will hurt her. This too will hurt her. Let her figure it out. That she can’t use her friends as “support” and constant security blankets. You are protecting your heart. You don’t have to friggin’ tell her WHY you’re doing limited contact. Just limit contact. And you don’t need to give her “closure” (if she asks for that one day). She can give herself her OWN closure. One day she’ll realize that *gasp!* you are a PERSON with a heart that can break and a soul that can yearn. That you have a LIFE (to go to post-grad studies) and a FAMILY (that you can show off your relationships to).
Best,
Inky
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