Cherryblossom: Nailed it!! I especially like the questions you posed, “Would he be there for you if you need someone to accompany you to the doctor? Would he pick you up if the weather is bad? Would he defend you and your choices in front of other people or would he side with them instead? Would he do these things willingly when you ask him properly, without having to beg him or him being annoyed?” I’m going to think about these because they’d offer valuable insight.

You also said, “True love is not about “wanting” the other person to behave in a particular way, but it is about “allowing” the other person to just BE.” I thought this was a great reminder. We actually had a discussion yesterday. We were going to “Petfest” with his family (literally just a festival where people can bring their pets and walk around). When I approached him I was wearing a burgundy knee length sweater dress and leather boots. Now that it’s fall I was excited to wear one of my favorite fall outfits. One of the first things he said to me was, “You didn’t have to get so dressed up. We’re just going to Petfest.” A “you look nice” and just accepting that was the outfit I wanted to wear would’ve been much more appreciated. Interestingly, his sister wore a cotton dress as well. So what I was wearing wasn’t exactly outlandish.

Cheryl: Thanks for your reply! I agree that that it feels good to be with someone who will be kind, get up in the night to get you a drink, cuddle when your ill, etc… As an emotional person, this is one of my favorite things about being in a loving relationship.