Dear Angel1972:

You wrote in your last post: ” I am used to him being the one to build me up.”

Can you imagine a relationship where one person destroys the other, then builds them up just so to have something to destroy again. And can you imagine, in such a relationship, the person being destroyed, again and again, forgets that part and only remember the building-up parts?

It is very, very tough to experience the “moments of utter panic” you mentioned. It is managing those moments, learning to calm yourself in those moments, that is key to taking on and succeeding in the mission of building yourself up.

anita