Dear sunflowerbird89:

Very young people are eager to connect, often desperate and will connect with almost anyone. When older, once out of school/ college and in the work force and thinking marriage, the need to connect is more selective, due to time constraints, stresses of employment, a romantic relationship, often starting a family.

You dream about your group of ex friends from college because, I believe, that was the last time you felt that connection with others we all need to have. You need to connect; you need a social life. But different people, different age group, different values. The connections you will make (one at a time) will be of a different nature, different time line (slower), different circumstances.

You have a gap of a few years of nothing much going on socially, a gap between the old way (school/ college connections) and the new way, yet to be actualized.

Can you list ways for you to meet a future friend, expecting perhaps that it will take longer than making school friends, that the connecting will be of a different character…?

anita