Hi Williams,

It seems to me that once you left YOUR country, your husband felt free to show you his shadow side.

There is legitimacy in staying together for the children. But here’s the catch (for him): He needs to treat you with respect. I don’t care if you are like friendly roommates. And the feeling of drifting apart is normal in that it’s just that ~ a FEELING. The next time he puts your down or mentions the “Divorce” word in front of the children, YOU are taking them back to your home.

Start squirreling away money for this to happen. Even more valuable than courses is a job and your own bank account. Get your papers and the kids’ papers in order. If you have to, take the kids and stay in a women’s shelter.

Tell him you married him out of the goodness of your heart. He presumably had to work to get you to agree to marry him (courtship, flowers, etc.). Now he has to work to get out of the marriage. That means going to counseling for at least as long as the original courtship.

As for the young teacher, this is only a much needed fantasy. He is a teacher AND he’s too young for you and to take on a second family IMHO.

Blessings,

Inky

• This reply was modified 8 years ago by Inky.