Dear susand63:

It is your right to say NO. Let your cousin know in no uncertain terms that he is not welcome to stay in your home, not even for a night. Make it clear to your husband as well. You don’t even need to provide a reason for your choice- it is simply your right. It is YOUR home, so you decide who visits, who stays there and who does not.

You may feel uncomfortable stating that definite No, but stating NO will take a moment. On the other hand, your projected discomfort of letting him stay in your home will last night after night, day after day, weeks and … however long. Better be assertive and clear.

anita