Hi Dee,

I remember a long time ago my best friend was chatting with me about how he felt like he wasnt progressing and wanted to progress quickly despite being in his 20s. I remember telling him what do you want to acheive, where are you trying to get to? We always spoke of doing some good in life but he was influenced by successful people around him. I told him you can be successfull by being the best you, you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone, ever.
When you say I’ve got nothing to prove even at a young age of 28, is it possible that your ego is trying to tell you ‘Dee you should be ahead in life, how come you’re still stuck here?’ Now remeber that this is not the real you just a false projection of you in your mind, pushing you, the monkey mind that is so critical of you becuase it can’t face the false fear of what might not get done or what you might not become. I used to drink because it was fun but because I thought it gave me a personality, something to mask my fear of people and what they thought of me in social situation, it simply made my ego flourish, trying to be funny and yet causing false fear at the same time. Then on day I decided to take a few days off and read a few stories of other people who quit, motivated myself at how I could be a better me and realize I didn’t need it any more. The next thing I did was read a few articles and books on how to silence the ego, is this possible, yes I read about how destructive it can be and cause human beings minds to make choices they wouldn’t even consider. Slow and steady gains is what I told myself, the beauty of calming the mindand being still is something I can’t describe.

If you are able to take some time away, seek a peacefull time to put as much effort into reclaiming your mind as you would your work then I feel it is a step in the right direction. You are not as old as your ego says and definitely not as old as some people who really lost. NJ