Hello Xx,

I do not know how this came about in my email and I do not normally participate in forums. But I am going to share with you that you are not unlovable and you are not alone in thinking this way. Please take a pause and consider this thought before you go any further.

I am 62. I have felt un-loveable most of my my life, until it was pointed out to me that perhaps my family loved me, I had some friends that loved me, my dog loved me and in fact I was not unlovable. Like you are probably feeling right now, at the time this did little to comfort me as my parents actually did not love and neither did my brothers and sisters. It does not get much worse than that does it?
You can perhaps be in a better position to decide if you need to change a pattern and how.

One of the things I have always pushed hard against is other people’s insight on my behavior. I see that as a pattern I need to change. Perhaps they are right if even a little bit right. I of course do not have to let them know I am right, but I will give it some thought.

Here is a piece of myself; I have raised 4 sons. They do not call me, nor remember me when it is important to me. Why? Are they ungrateful and selfish,..a little. But I realize that I have to take the “mother smother” off of them for them to feel comfortable around me. I know this will take years for them to recognize and they will test me. But I want a relationship with them and taking a pause has given me time to think this over.

Do this for yourself. BTW, I am confident that anyone reading your email felt some love for you.

Fond regards,

Maureen