1. Making a difference in my small part of the world. Helping others. Feeling at peace inside. A loving girlfriend. Perhaps a dog (she doesn’t like animals). Living by the sea (she doesn’t want to).
2. I would regret not listening to myself, being ‘talked into’ something for the sake of not rocking the boat, for the sake of looking good, for the sake of how the story ‘should’ go, much as I lived when I was with men. I am not sure that I would regret never having a child.
3. Sure life throws curve-balls! I would have been excited 10 years ago if someone told me I’d have a girlfriend as I was always aware of my attraction to women. I was just scared of what people would think if I did anything. I would have been in awe of the brave future me. And I am! So proud of myself for coming out. It has been amazing and I feel it in my heart 🙂 Incidentally, she was not the woman who catalysed my coming out, there were other involvements before her, the process started 3 years before we met.

Now my questions for you: ‘Don’t be scared’…of what? Of having a child? I’m not sure that its fear, it’s just gut instinct that it’s not my path. I have never felt truly connected to the idea, just sort of obliged to think about it because of my age. I did face the issue, ask myself some questions, I’m grateful to her for guiding me to do so. I just can’t wholeheartedly enter into something so big, and she hasn’t actually asked me to.

‘have more confidence’…in what? My ability to be a mother, to build a family? I am not at the stage where confidence is even relevant (see above)
‘have more confidence’…in my/our decision to split? Yes, I am trying to. Hence this post…