Dear Rich:

You are welcome. In your last post you mentioned your “pattern of engaging in relationships with people whom I think I can help, which is really a selfish way of me obtaining love and security from others”-

I am familiar with this pattern. A child, observing an undependable parent, figures: if I help my parent, make him strong and dependable, then he/ she will make it possible for me to be safe. All motivations of a child is about survival, self interest is a motivation we share with all living things, and so, it is not selfish.

So I understand the pattern you referred to is being attracted to women who need a lot of help, as in a “repetition compulsion”- to fix her so that you can be safe. Is that it?

anita