Dear Bubba:

I am glad you are back with an update. Congratulations for NOT responding to him again and again. Wise choice, following clear thinking on your part!

You wrote: “I am still confused and have no answers for his actions.” But then, in the same sentence,  you cleared your own confusion: “All I know is that he was very selfish, cruel, disrespectful and ignorant. I feel  betrayed and used, I feel dissapointed and I don’t trust him”

– that means his actions are about him being selfish, cruel and disrespectful. He probably wants what he wanted before, after the breakup, sex with no commitment. But one thing is clear to me: the fact that he was selfish, cruel and disrespectful to you AND the fact that he did not sincerely and at length apologized for his behavior, followed by making real amends and changing his behavior, is indication to me that there is no reason for you to assume that he is no longer selfish, cruel and disrespectful.

You asked again: “But his actions are confusing. Why is he contacting me? Does he just want attention or does he really care and does not know how to approach me and start a convo?”-if he wanted to start a conversation- he should have stated that. It is not your job to figure out what he wants, it is HIS job to make it known.

You wrote: “I am afraid that if he is persistent that I will give in. The question is if he asks for forgiveness and wants to get back together, is it even worth it?”- my answer is: no, it is not worth it. It will be a big mistake on your part, bringing yourself more misery. You will be losing the good feeling you gained by not contacting him for so long.

As I wrote, IF he sincerely apologized, with details, realizing in depth what he did wrong, then maybe, maybe. But there has been no communication on his part with such insight, suggestion of significant amends of his behavior, and no reason to assume that there is any such which he is not expressing.

Keep posting. I like your no-response to him. Keep at it.

anita