I am not just rejecting Christianity, I am eschewing the spiritual path altogether.

It brought it home to me this weekend just how horrible spiritual awakening is. There’s nothing nice about it. You’re up and down like a roller coaster. When you’re down, you crave a ‘higher vibration’, and when you’re up, you begin isolating yourself from family and the things you think will ‘ground you’. It all just becomes background noise. But then it gets worse, because if you stay in a ‘high vibrational state’ for very long, you become de-realised and depersonalized. I have now chosen to stay grounded for as long as possible. Plenty of meat and alcohol for me.

I see them fuckers in church and it makes me laugh. They all want to be ‘close to God’, yet the brainless twats have no idea what that means. It means mental breakdown, psychosis, depersonalization, de-realization, hospitalization, anxiety and depression. I am so fucking angry that this has happened to me. Really angry and really pissed off.

Tannhauser