Dear Nick:

Of the examples you gave, I found the following being inappropriate:

1. “I remember when I was 10, I was walking around in a towel and my mom kept on saying ‘Ooh, I want to see you naked!’”  inappropriate because it was said by an adult to a child and because it was said by a mother to her son. What did that statement mean? The “Ooh” part of the statement expresses some kind of excitement. Suggesting to see you naked does mean seeing your private part, as that is what naked is. What is the nature of the excitement she did express, I don’t know. Could be a curiosity of sorts, but excitement it is. Not a good idea, to say the least, for a mother to express excitement over the idea of seeing her son’s private parts.

2. “my mom and dad made fun of me for walking around in a towel when I was maybe 11”- inappropriate because it is inappropriate to make fun of a person for any reason. Because it is two adults making fun of a child and because the two adults are the child’s parents. And because the topic of the fun, the teasing, is a child’s naked body (underneath the towel).

3. “my dad jokingly said something about taking photos of me when I change”- inappropriate because his statement is about taking lightly the threat in that statement, the threat of violating your privacy. And because the privacy here is again.. your naked body.

To me, your anxiety around these comments I listed is understandable. It doesn’t surprise me that you are still bothered by these. Perhaps talking to your parents, together or separately, about these very comments can help- since you wrote that they are nice and supportive. If they discuss the matter with a serious attitude, respecting your feelings, considering their comments to be inappropriate, understanding the harm it caused you… and then asking your forgiveness and offer amends, maybe there will be a resolution in your mind and heart regarding these.

anita