Hi Christina,

Have you ever heard of the book called “I hate you, don’t leave me?”. It’s a book I have read, and mostly a book given by therapists for people with Borderline Personality Disorder. Or other Personality Disorders. They say things impulsively one moment, then beg for you to show them attention, Chase them, only to push you away again.

I was this person. I sabatoge many of my relationships this way. I had very poor self-esteem, poor coping skills, unable to communicate under distress, said things out of impulsiveness, only to take it back, it was awful. I finally got on emotion regulation medication and am in intense therapy, such as DBT.

Your ex or boyfriend shows many signs of someone with BPD. Has he ever mentioned to you he has mental illness? Has he ever been in therapy? It sounds to me, he May love you, but may have a personality disorder, or perhaps ADHD, it makes it very hard for these people to communicate, they act in a childish manner when you try to communicate with him.

Perhaps, if he was willing to look into therapy, it might help him to resolve some underlying issues of his behavior. Keep us posted.