Hi Sarah,

You mentioned your past relationship was filled with alot of emotional intensity, ups, downs, intensity. That is something you got used to. Sometimes when we get used to something, it’s almost like we “crave” that emotional intensity for so long. It has a hold on us. There may have also not been closure with your ex, and you are missing certain aspects of that relationship, even though it was not healthy, it’s all you knew and in a way sort of exhilarating.

Fast forward to know, the anxiety is coming from being in a healthy, normal, stable relationship. There is no excitement, drama, emotions, intensity that you experienced in the past, and there is a part of you know that is craving it. Maybe try to create excitement in the relationship, but in a healthy way. Plan surprises. Go for a weekend getaway, do something together you have never done. When you get out of your routine, the magic can come back and bring back those “butterflies”. Surprise him with a bubble bath, go to a drive in..yes there are still some of them out there. Go to a laser light show to at a planetarium. Go for a romantic long drive at night, take a telescope and look at stars. Just the smallest things to get you “unstuck” and bring back the giddiness.

• This reply was modified 7 years, 5 months ago by Eliana.