Thank you Anita for your always genuine amazing advice. I definitely agree with you that I have to learn that I’m never going to be “safe”, it is something I struggle with having anxiety and all. I want to ask you how you feel about this situation.

So the other day my boyfriend and I were talking about how or phones had gotten stolen multiple times in our life. I told him oh remember when yours got stolen that night at college (while we were broken up that time with the girl) and he goes my phone never got stolen? Just my wallet and my keys that night. He went to sleep. I panicked and panicked omg why did he lie WHERE was he, WHO was he with, if he had his phone…. he could’ve been anywhere. At the time we shared locations and his was off because his phone was off. The thing is I remember at this time that he sent me a police report stating how they had found an iPhone wallet and keys, so I knew he must have forgot. But then it went to…. HE said HE slept at home, but how if he didn’t have his keys? Panicked. I woke him up at 6am saying I’m sorry but are you sure you slept at home if you didn’t have your keys and he’s like idk I probably slept on the couch that was so long ago and I was so drunk that night I don’t know. Then… 5 minutes later he goes ACTUALLY I slept outside of Starbucks on campus I didn’t want to tell you because it’s so embarrassing and I didn’t want you telling anyone.

I know this makes sense because his belongings were found on campus and he said he lost it walking super drunk and he got frustrated because he didn’t know where he was and he just sat down and fell asleep.

But I’m just so annoyed that I didn’t know this before… I know I’ve asked about that night before maybe not in a really really long time but I definitely did. Do you think he has like a lying issue??? Is this even something serious??? Why do I feel like I have the need to know everything about my boyfriend. Like if I don’t know something it’s considered hiding. Like at the time we weren’t together it was so stupid and irrelevant with everything else’s going on I’m sure he didn’t care about it but why does it bother me so much that he kept this from me…