Dear Michael:

You wrote: “I’m just confused between what I actually need from a partner to have a healthy relationship, and what is simply anxiety/ insecurity making it’s way through”-

This is how you can tell the difference: if you look up to him to make you feel better, like a child looks up to a parent for comfort, than it is not a healthy relationship, and it is the anxiety of past operating. On the other hand, if you look to him as an equal, asking for and receiving comfort from him, on one hand, and on the other, he is asking you for comfort when he needs it, and he receives it from you, then you have a healthy relationship.

You wrote in your original post that before this boyfriend you “had been through a series of relationships that ended badly, causing me develop relationship anxiety”- what is the history of the most powerful relationship/s in your life, the ones with your parent/s?

anita