Anita,

I understand. I am not committing to the reality to protect and comfort myself  …  but this kind of coping isn’t good because I keep going back and forth between heaven and hell.

I still cannot let go of the “heaven” yet now

I will be ready but it isn’t now unfortunately and everyday I just wish that maybe somehow I will die.

or I will be able to sleep forever … to just avoid reality.

I realise that the only way to escape reality is to face reality itself

-Mina