Dear Mina:

What if you had to live your whole life with a person you dislike, a person so awful, so selfish, that you wonder if she is even human. What if you woke up to that person being there in the morning,  and you went to sleep with that person there, and in between morning and night, there she is,  no escape.

If that person, awful, selfish, was you, then you are “locked in” with that person. In your post from two days ago you wrote: “I am not even human…  cowardice act… such an awful person… very selfish”.

When you are stuck with a person like that, you want to escape that person, and you think, as you shared in your last post: ” How life isn’t worth living, how ending my life would be the answer to all of my problems”.

We need to be “locked in” with a good, loving and lovable person. A perfect GPA is not the same as love, has nothing to do with love. Neither does material and professional success following a high or perfect GPA have anything to do with love.

To explore your self disapproval and the guilt you feel, I ask: do you remember disapproving of yourself before you met your ex boyfriend? If you’d like, go back in time, scan your memory and share when and in what context did you feel inadequate, not good enough, less than perfect, and therefore unacceptable.

anita