Dear N:

You are welcome.

You wrote: “my dad isn’t necessarily on the side of ‘psychobabble’” – Neither am I on the side of psychobabble. Psychotherapy with a .. psycho-babbling therapist is not what I am suggesting.

You wrote in an earlier post: “I’ve never been in an honest relationship before. So I’m not used to being completely open to anyone or reliant on anyone”

The psychotherapy I am suggesting is about the therapist being honest with you, so that you will be having your first honest relationship, a relationship in which, for the first time, you will be completely open to someone and reliant on, that is, trusting that someone, for the first time, to not hurt you when you are honest and completely open.

I am sure you feel that you can trust your parents in some regards and that you appreciate greatly every expression of affection they displayed toward you or every single thing they did for you. Unfortunately, they did hurt you when you were honest and completely open, and this is why you keep to yourself, stay in your own head, and you “seem standoffish, insincere and cynical”.

There is a whole other you waiting to come to the surface- an honest, sincere, open, loving woman. She’s been there all along, waiting. I hope you post again.

anita