Dear Heartbrokengurl:

I don’t think he is trying to lead you on, from your shares about him so far. Reads to me like he is troubled by his own internal conflicts, fears, and so on, issues from his past, before he met you. He is not a cold hearted manipulator trying to lead you on, not from my understanding.

Thing is how do you not lead yourself on? His text reads very positive and promising, and if you focus on it, you might lead yourself on to think that he can be that positive and promising all the time, at least from the moment he fell in love with you deeply enough.

Not the case. It is only a text. He is still the troubled individual that he is. There is no… falling in love with you enough to change this reality. Your speech to him didn’t work at all, you wrote. There is no fighting (title of your thread) for him that will work either.

There is nothing you can do to change the reality that it is his internal struggles responsible for his on-again-off-again attachment to you, so stop trying to fix or change or fight for him.

Consider my thoughts here and form your own. Try to relax into reality, enjoy Sunday and when you get distressed, repeat to yourself the thoughts that are congruent with the reality.

anita