Hi Casey,

The thing with doing what you’re doing, (which I will add, is something I used to do so I’m saying this out of experience), is that you become the overfunctioner and he becomes the underfunctioner. You do all the work in the ‘relationship’ whilst he doesn’t have too. What you value as important he may not,  so you say “My biggest frustration is I expect the same courtesy or him as I would do for him” what you see as important to you, won’t always match somebody elses expectations, & I don’t think he holds those same expectations. His responses aren’t clear because he would like to keep that tie with you as it is convenient for him when he has a gap to fill, but doesn’t want to hurt your feelings in bluntly saying no – I say this through experience, but there is a possibility I may be wrong, but this has happened to me alot & I ended up questioning myself or the situation, something you’ve found yourself doing.

The truth is, if he truly wants to be with you he would be, if he truly wanted to communicate regularly then he would. He has said he doesn’t want a relationship & although that doesn’t say “I don’t want a relationship I don’t wish to continue with you” I think you should really weigh what he means .. What do you want this to progress to then as a relationship isn’t on his cards?Do you just want friends with benefits?

• This reply was modified 7 years, 1 month ago by Poppyxo.