Dear Fae:

You are welcome. You wrote above: “My whole family has depression and anxiety”- notice you used the present tense. And you wrote earlier: ” I have been going through an intensely emotional period at home”- again, present tense.

You then wrote: “anxiety has followed me my  whole life”- it followed you to the city and back to your hometown.

It may be a good idea for you to move away from home and your hometown, maybe if and when you lose your job, if  not before. Your anxiety started at home and is maintained, present tense. It  is maintained, now, at home.

Once  you move again, the  anxiety will follow  you, but away from home, away from its maintenance, there is a  chance of healing. If you do move, manage your anxiety better than you did before, build social support, perhaps AA, as soon as  you get there. Seek quality psychotherapy, as soon as it is possible for you. Limit your communications with your parents/ family/ anyone who maintains or  promotes  your anxiety.

I hope you post again with your thoughts and feelings.

anita