Dear Poppyxo:

You wrote: “how can I change  it?” and  answered  previously, Nov 17: “I  simply keep my cool” in relation to your mother (I wonder if you are always successful keeping your cool with her?)

Extend this awareness to everyone, the  awareness that  you cannot change anyone. Not because any particular person is unnaturally  stubborn, but because people are  motivated by emotions, mostly by fear, and you can not calm that fear  of theirs on a regular basis. You cannot be  there with them day in and day out, every moment, and put out that fire, that fear.

When you are aware, in any situation, when interacting  with any  person, that there really  is  nothing  that you can do, it is  very minimal, then you relax.

anita