Dear Cali Chica:

Regarding your mother’s suffering: you only know what she told you and the little you remember of the behavior of an aunt and uncles and such. Sure your mother suffered (otherwise she wouldn’t be inflicting her daughters with so much of it), but what you know about her suffering is not The Truth. After all, your mother is not a truth teller, is she. Some of what she told you is true, some are outright lies, lots is twisted into a presentation that fits her motivations. And then, what you remember is suspect as being The Truth, because our memory is so selective. If it fits what we are told, we’ll remember it. If it doesn’t, we get confused and forget.

Regarding your suffering: do you think you suffer less than your mother ever did?

Did you have a better childhood than your mother’s?

Do you have a better life than your mother?

anita