Hi LotusLeaf,

Congratulations on cutting Sister 1 out of your life! What an amazing step and an accomplishment to be proud of! Many people do not ever get to this place and it sounds like you are now healing and thriving!

I understand from your original post that Sister 2 is sad and hurting that you can’t go back to being a normal family unit– with all three siblings still in contact, and presumably your parents still around.  This sounds to me a lot like your sister is grieving.  She needs to go through this process and work through all of her feelings on her own, unfortunately.  his is not anything that you are responsible for fixing.  Perhaps your role in your family growing up may have been to always be “fixing” things, however, it sounds to me like you have outgrown this and now realize that it’s far more important and beneficial to everyone that you take care of yourself and your own partner/family first.  This is great!

Additionally, you say “She does not expect any resolution between me and the other sister, nor has she asked me to make up, for which I am grateful.”  It doesn’t sound like Sister 2 is putting any undue pressure on you to change anything of the current situation nor is she trying to put her feelings on you.  Sounds like she is respecting your boundaries and choices and is not asking you to make her happy.

So, as far as your question as to what to do in the situation– do you just mean about her being unhappy and grieving the previous family dynamic?  I don’t want to assume anything– could you explain exactly which part you’re looking to get guidance on?

Congratulations again on your removal of a toxic family member! Many good things are to come!!

Amy