Wow.. what a punch in the gut Louise.

What red flags from your story that shows up for me are:

1. You are still with another guy when you started dating, i.e. no clean break in living separately

2. This other guy has had two failed marriages with kids with each wife

3.  He came in hard and fast with the driving long distances to be with you, the money he spent on you and wanting to marry you/living together

4. This was a very short period of time.  You said you met him in September of 2017?  So all of this transpired in less than 6 months

5. Something happened that involved Social Services so he cannot be with his kid alone

He *may* have loved you but as you know love shows up in different ways, is not always forever, and is usually conditional.

You have experienced a classic whirlwind romance and breakup.  I wish you grace and gentle healing through this grief stage.

Mark