Dear Jenny Lynn:

I changed my mind. I am alarmed. The Problem as I see it is that he is Paranoid, as in a mental disorder, a sickness.

You can’t fix it with better communication or accommodating him. He has no logical reason to be paranoid with you, to suspect you, to spy on you, check on you… and no, you didn’t cheat on him. You are a sweet, loving, wonderful young woman who did nothing to bring this about. He was this way before you came into his life, paranoid.

So, you are living with a sick individual. Leave as soon as possible, is my suggestion. But do so carefully. You need someone to protect you as you move out. Even if you think he is at work, he may be watching you, so you need someone there when you pack and leave. It can be the police, you can call the police for this purpose. It can be someone else, but needs to be a woman, I guess, or a man who can protect you, someone legally carrying a weapon.

Talk to the police regarding getting a restraining order, so that he is not allowed to come close to your place of work or to anywhere you live.

My goodness, I did not expect myself to be typing this today. I am so sorry. What an unexpected turn, for me. I hope you write to me in the next twenty minutes or so, before I get off the computer. And I hope he doesn’t have access to this thread and website!

anita