Dear Craig:

My thoughts: she texts you something she intends to be a joke. You respond in a way that indicates you didn’t realize she was joking. After one or two such experiences, I would imagine a reasonable person on the sending end of the jokes will stop sending them. But she kept doing so three, four and more times. Is that correct? Either she is not reasonable and/ or she is manipulative, that is, finding a “reason” (same reason, over and over again), to withdraw. She is producing a reason to withdraw.

It fits with her telling you that there is no future between the two of you, the other day, and then waiting to see if you cancel the tickets. She may have her reasons to withdraw but needs a better reason, so she produces reasons: you don’t get her jokes, you cancelled the tickets.

I don’t know her motivation underneath her intent to withdraw. I think anger. Underneath the anger, probably fear. But then fear is underneath almost every motivation to withdraw or to fight.

anita